Orthorexia
Nervosa: The Health Food Eating Disorder
by Steven Bratman,
M.D.
Because I am a physician who practices
alternative medicine, patients who come to me often begin the
conversation by asking whether they can be cured through diet.
"Regular medical doctors don't know anything about nutrition," they
say, believing this will build rapport with me. I feel obligated to
nod wisely. I agree that conventional medicine has traditionally
paid too little attention to the effects of diet. However, I am no
longer the true believer in nutritional medicine I used to be. My
attitude has grown cautious where once it was enthusiastic and even
evangelical.
I have lost two beliefs that once encouraged me, and that are still
widely accepted by others who promote dietary methods of healing.
One of these is an assumption that there exists a comprehensive and
consistent theory of healing diseases through nutrition. The other
is a faith that dietary therapy is a uniformly wholesome, side
effect free intervention.
My attitude has not always been so lukewarm. Twenty years ago I was
a wholehearted, impassioned advocate of healing through food. My
optimism was unbounded as I set forth to cure myself and everyone
else. This was long before I became an alternative physician. In
those days, I was a cook and organic farmer at a large commune in
upstate New York. My experiences there formed the foundation of my
early interest in alternative medicine, and continue to give me
insight into the ideals, dreams and contradictions that underlie
the natural health movement.
All communes attract idealists. Ours attracted food idealists. As a
staff cook I was required to prepare several separate meals at once
to satisfy the insistent and conflicting demands of the members.
The main entree was always vegetarian. However, a small but vocal
group insisted on an optional serving of meat. Since many
vegetarians would not eat from pots and pans contaminated by
fleshly vibrations, this meat had to be cooked in a separate
kitchen. The cooks also had to satisfy the Lacto-ovo-vegetarians,
or Vegans, who eschewed all milk and egg products. The rights of
the non-garlic, non-onion, Hindu-influenced crowd could not be
neglected either. They believed onion-family foods provoked sexual
desire.
For the raw foodists (and young children) we always laid out trays
of sliced raw vegetables. However, a visitor once tried to convince
me that chopping a vegetable would destroy its etheric field. I
chased him out of the kitchen with a huge Chinese cleaver.
The macrobiotic adherents clamored for cooked vegetables, free, of
course, from "deadly nightshade" plants such as tomatoes, potatoes,
bell peppers and eggplants. Some also insisted on eating fruits and
vegetables only when they were in season, while other communalists
intemperately demanded oranges in January.
Besides these opinions on which food to serve, there were as many
opinions on the manner in which it should be prepared. Most
everyone agreed that nothing could be boiled in aluminum, except
the gourmet cooks, who insisted that only aluminum would spread the
heat satisfactorily.
By consensus, we always steamed vegetables in the minimum amount of
water to avoid throwing away precious vitamins. Certain enthusiasts
would even hover around the kitchen and volunteer to drink the
darkish liquids left behind. About washing vegetables, however,
controversy swirled. Some commune members firmly believed that
vital substances clinging just under the skins must be preserved at
all costs. Others felt that a host of evil pollutants adhered to
the same surfaces that needed to be vigorously scrubbed away. One
visitor explained that the best policy was to dip all vegetables in
bleach, and gave such a convincing argument for her belief that we
would have adopted the principle at once were it not for a
fortuitous bleach shortage.
I used to fantasize writing a universal cookbook for eating
theorists. Each food would come complete with a citation from one
system or authority claiming it the most divine edible ever
created, and another, from an opposing view, damning it as the
worst pestilence one human being ever fed to another.
This would not be difficult. For example, a famous naturopathic
concept proclaims that raw fruits and vegetables are the ideal
foods. Some proponents of this school exclaim periodically "the
greatest enemy of man is the cooking stove!" However, another
popular theory bans raw foods as unhealthy, and attributes to their
consumption such illnesses as MS, rheumatoid arthritis and cancer.
I am referring to macrobiotics. This influential system of
alternative dietary principles insists that all vegetables should
be cooked; fruits should not be eaten at all.
Similar discrepancies abound in alternative dietary medicine. The
following rules may be found in one or another food theory:
Spicy food is bad.
Cayenne peppers are health promoting.
Fasting on oranges is healthy.
Citrus fruits are too acidic.
Fruits are the ideal food.
Fruit causes candida.
Milk is good only for young cows.
Pasteurized milk is even worse.
Boiled milk "is the food of the gods."
Fermented foods, such as sauerkraut, are essentially rotten.
Fermented foods aid digestion.
Sweets are bad.
Honey is nature's most perfect food.
Vinegar is a poison.
Apple cider vinegar cures most illnesses.
Proteins should not be combined with starches.
Aduki beans and brown rice should always be cooked together.
The discovery that nutritional medicine was so chaotic troubled me.
Yet I could always hope that a universal theory of nutrition might
eventually be found. What disturbed me more was observing the
extremism that so frequently develops among those who propound
dietary cures.
I remember a macrobiotic seminar at the commune, led by Mr. L. of
the Kushi institute. An audience of at least thirty-five listened
with rapt attention as Mr. L. lectured on the evils of milk. It
slows the digestion, he explained, clogs the metabolism, plugs the
arteries, dampens the digestive fire, and causes mucous,
respiratory diseases and cancer.
At that time, a member of the commune by the name of John lived in
a small room upstairs from the seminar hall. He was a "recovering"
alcoholic who rather frequently failed to abstain. Although only in
his fifties, John's face showed the marks of a lifetime of alcohol
abuse. But he had been on the wagon for nearly six months when he
tiptoed through the class.
John was a shy and private man who would never voluntarily have so
exposed himself. But upon returning from the kitchen with a
beverage he discovered that there was no way he could reach his
room without crossing through the crowded seminar. The leader
noticed him immediately.
Pointing to the glass of milk in John's hand, Mr. L. boomed, "Don't
you realize what that stuff is doing to your body, sir! Class, look
at him! He is a testament to the health destroying properties of
milk. Study the puffy skin of his face. Note the bags under his
eyes. Look at the stiffness of his walk. Milk, class, milk has done
this to him!"
Bewildered, John looked at his glass, then up at the condemning
faces, then back to the milk again. His lower lip quivered. "But,"
he whimpered, "but, this is only milk, isn't it?"
In the alcoholics anonymous meetings with which John was familiar,
milk was practically mother's milk, synonymous with rectitude and
purity. "I mean," he continued, to the unforgiving students, "I
mean, it isn't whiskey, is it?"
By focusing on diet singlemindedly and ignoring all other aspects
of life, alternative practitioners like Dr. L. come to practice a
form of medicine that lacks a holistic perspective on life. This is
ironic, of course, since holism is one of the strongest ideals of
alternative medicine, and its most ubiquitous catchphrase (next to
"natural").
It would be more holistic to take time to understand the whole
person before making dietary recommendations, and occasionally
temper those recommendations with an acknowledgment of other
elements in that person's life. But too often patient and
alternative practitioner work together to create an exaggerated
focus on food.
Many of the most unbalanced people I have ever met are those have
devoted themselves to healthy eating. In fact, I believe many of
them have contracted a novel eating disorder, for which I have
coined the name "orthorexia nervosa." The term uses "ortho," in its
meaning as straight, correct and true, to modify "anorexia
nervosa." Orthorexia nervosa refers to a fixation on eating proper
food.
Orthorexia begins innocently enough, as a desire to overcome
chronic illness or to improve general health. But because it
requires considerable willpower to adopt a diet which differs
radically from the food habits of childhood and the surrounding
culture, few accomplish the change gracefully. Most must resort to
an iron self-discipline bolstered by a hefty sense of superiority
over those who eat junk food. Over time, what they eat, how much,
and the consequences of dietary indiscretion come to occupy a
greater and greater proportion of the orthorexic's day.
The act of eating pure food begins to carry pseudo-spiritual
connotations. As orthorexia progresses, a day filled with sprouts,
umeboshi plums and amaranth biscuits comes to feel as holy as one
spent serving the poor and homeless. When an orthorexic slips up,
(which, depending on the pertinent theory, may involve anything
from devouring a single raisin in violation of the law to consuming
a gallon of Haagen Daz ice cream and a supreme pizza), he
experiences a fall from grace, and must take on numerous acts of
penitence. These usually involve ever stricter diets and
fasts.
Over time, this "kitchen spirituality" begins to override other
sources of meaning. An orthorexic will be plunged into gloom by
eating a hot dog, even if his team has just won the world series.
Conversely, he can redeem any disappointment by extra efforts at
dietary purity.
Orthorexia eventually reaches a point where the sufferer spends
most of his time planning, purchasing and eating meals. The
orthorexic's inner life becomes dominated by efforts to resist
temptation, self-condemnation for lapses, self-praise for success
at complying with the self-chosen regime, and feelings of
superiority over others less pure in their dietary habits.
It is this transference of all life's value into the act of eating
which makes orthorexia a true disorder. In this essential
characteristic, orthorexia bears many similarities to the two named
eating disorders: anorexia and bulemia. Whereas the bulimic and
anorexic focus on the quantity of food, the orthorexic fixates on
its quality. All three give to food a vastly excessive place in the
scheme of life.
It often surprises me how blissfully unaware proponents of
nutritional medicine remain of the propensity for their technique
to create an obsession. Indeed, popular books on natural medicine
seem to actively promote orthorexia in their enthusiasm for
sweeping dietary changes. No doubt, this is a compensation for the
diet-averse stance of modern medicine. However, when healthy eating
becomes a disease in its own right, it is arguably worse than the
health problems which began the cycle of fixation.
As often happens, my sensitivity to the problem of orthorexia comes
through personal experience. I myself passed through a phase of
extreme dietary purity when I lived at the commune. In those days,
when I wasn't cooking I managed the organic farm. This gave me
constant access to fresh, high-quality produce. Eventually, I
became such a snob that I disdained to eat any vegetable that had
been plucked from the ground more than fifteen minutes ago. I was a
total vegetarian, chewed each mouthful of food fifty times, always
ate in a quiet place (which meant alone), and left my stomach
partially empty at the end of each meal.
After a year or so of this self imposed regime, I felt light, clear
headed, energetic, strong and self-righteous. I regarded the
wretched, debauched souls about me downing their chocolate chip
cookies and fries as mere animals reduced to satisfying gustatory
lusts. But I wasn't complacent in my virtue. Feeling an obligation
to enlighten my weaker brethren, I continuously lectured friends
and family on the evils of refined, processed food and the dangers
of pesticides and artificial fertilizers.
For two years I pursued wellness through healthy eating, as
outlined by naturopathic tradition and emphasized with little
change in the health food literature of today. Gradually, however,
I began to sense that something was wrong.
The need to obtain food free of meat, fat and artificial chemicals
put nearly all social forms of eating out of reach. Furthermore,
intrusive thoughts of sprouts came between me and good
conversation. Perhaps most dismaying of all, I began to sense that
the poetry of my life had diminished. All I could think about was
food.
But even when I became aware that my scrabbling in the dirt after
raw vegetables and wild plants had become an obsession, I found it
terribly difficult to free myself. I had been seduced by righteous
eating. The problem of my life's meaning had been transferred
inexorably to food, and I could not reclaim it.
I was eventually saved from the doom of eternal health food
addiction through three fortuitous events. The first occurred when
my guru in eating, a lacto-ovo-vegetarian headed on his way toward
Fruitarianism, suddenly abandoned his quest. He explained that he
had received a sudden revelation. "It came to me last night in a
dream," he said. "Rather than eat my sprouts alone, it would be
better for me to share a pizza with some friends." I looked at him
dubiously, but did not completely disregard his message.
The second event occurred when an elderly gentleman (whom I had
been visiting as a volunteer home-health aide) offered me a piece
of Kraft Swiss cheese. Normally, I wouldn't have considered
accepting. I did not eat cheese, much less pasteurized, processed
and artificially flavored cheese. Worse still, I happened to be
sick with a head cold that day. According to my belief system at
that time, if I fasted on juice I would be over the cold in a day.
However, if I allowed great lumps of indigestible dairy products to
adhere to my innards I would no doubt remain sick for a week -- if
I did not go on to develop pneumonia.
But, Mr. Davis was earnest and persistent in his expression of
gratitude, and would have taken as a personal rebuke my refusal of
the cheese. Shaking with trepidation, I chewed the dread processed
product.
To my great surprise, it seemed to have a healing effect. My cold
symptoms disappeared within an hour. It was as if my acceptance of
his gratitude healed me.
Nonetheless, even after this miracle I could not let go. I actually
quit visiting Davis to avoid further defiling myself. This was a
shameful moment, a sign that I was drowning.
The life-ring which finally drew me out was tossed by a Benedictine
monk named Brother David Stendal-Rast. I had met him at a seminar
he gave on the subject of gratitude. Afterwards, I volunteered to
drive him home, for the covert purpose of getting to know him
better. (This may be called "opportunistic volunteerism.") On the
way to his monastery, although secretly sick of it, I bragged a bit
about my oral self-discipline, hoping to impress the monk. I
thought that he would respect me for never filling my stomach more
than by half, and so on. David's actions over the subsequent days
were a marvelous example of teaching through action.
The drive was long. In the late afternoon, we stopped for lunch at
one of those out of place Chinese restaurants -- the kind that
flourish in small towns where it seems no one of remotely oriental
ancestry has ever lived. As expected, all the waiters were
Caucasian, but the food was unexpectedly good. The sauces were
fragrant and tasty, the vegetables fresh, and the eggrolls crisp.
We were both pleasantly surprised.
After I had eaten the small portion which sufficed to fill my
stomach halfway, Brother David casually mentioned his belief that
it was an offense against God to leave food uneaten on the table.
This was particularly the case when such a great restaurant had so
clearly been placed in our path as a special grace. David was a
slim man and a monk, so I found it hardly credible that he followed
this precept generally. But he continued to eat so much that I felt
good manners, if not actual spiritual guidance, required me to
imitate his example. I filled my belly for the first time in a
year.
Then, he upped the ante. "I always think that ice cream goes well
with Chinese food, don't you?" he asked, blandly. Ignoring my
incoherent reply, Brother David directed us to a Friendly's Ice
Cream Parlor, and purchased me a triple scoop cone.
David led me on a two mile walk through the unexceptional town as
we ate our ice cream, edifying me with spiritual stories and, in
every way, keeping my mind from dwelling on the offense against
Health Food I had just committed. Later that evening, Brother David
ate an immense dinner in the monastery dining room, all the while
urging me to have more of one dish or another. I understood the
point. But what mattered more was the fact that this man, for whom
I had the greatest respect, was giving me permission to break my
Health Food vows. It proved a liberating stroke.
Yet, it was more than a month later that I finally decided to make
a decisive break. I was filled with feverish anticipation. Hordes
of long suppressed gluttonous desires, their legitimacy restored,
clamored to receive their due. On the twenty minute drive into
town, I planned and re-planned my junk food menu. Within ten
minutes of arriving, I had eaten three tacos, a medium pizza, and a
large milkshake. I brought the ice cream sandwich and banana split
home, for I was too stuffed to violate my former vows further. My
stomach was stretched to my knees.
The next morning I felt guilty and defiled. Only the memory of
Brother David kept me from embarking on a five day fast. (I only
fasted two days.) It took me at least two more years to attain the
ability to follow a middle way in eating easily, without rigid
calculation or wild swings.
Anyone who has ever suffered from anorexia or bulimia will
recognize classic patterns in this story: the cyclic extremes, the
obsession, the separation from others. These are all symptoms of an
eating disorder. Having experienced them so vividly in myself
twenty years ago, I cannot overlook their presence in others.
For this reason, as a practicing alternative physician I often feel
conflicted. I almost always recommend dietary improvements to my
patients. How could I not? A low fat, semi-vegetarian diet is
potent preventive medicine for nearly all major illnesses, and more
focused dietary interventions can often dramatically improve
specific health problems. But I do not feel entirely innocent when
I make dietary suggestions. Like drug therapy, I have come to
regard dietary modification as a treatment with serious potential
side effects.
Consider Andrea, a patient of mine who once suffered from chronic
asthma. When she first came to see me, she depended on several
medications to stay alive, but with my help she managed to free
herself from all drugs.
The method we used involved identifying foods to which Andrea was
sensitive and removing them from the diet. Milk was the first to
go, then wheat, soy and corn. After eliminating those four foods
the asthma symptoms decreased so much Andrea was able to cut out
one medication. But she wasn't satisfied.
Diligent effort identified other allergens: eggs, avocado,
tomatoes, barley, rye, chicken, beef, turkey, salmon and tuna.
These too Andrea eliminated, and was soon able to drop another drug
entirely. Next went broccoli, lettuce, apples, buckwheat and trout,
and the rest of her medications.
Unfortunately, after about three months of feeling well Andrea
began to discover that there were now other foods to which she was
sensitive. Oranges, peaches, celery and rice didn't suit her, nor
potatoes, turkey or amaranth biscuits. The only foods she could
definitely tolerate were lamb and (strangely) white sugar. Since
she couldn't actually live on those foods alone, Andrea was forced
to adopt a complex rotation diet, alternating grains on a meal by
meal basis, with an occasional complete abstention to allow her to
"clear." She did the same for vegetables, with somewhat more ease
since there was a greater variety to choose from.
Last week, Andrea came in for a follow-up visit, and described the
present state of her life to me. Wherever she goes, Andrea carries
a supply of her own particular foods. She doesn't go many places.
Most of the time she stays at home and thinks carefully about what
to eat next, because if she slips up the consequences continue for
weeks. The asthma doesn't come back, but she develops headaches,
nausea and strange moods. She must continuously exert her will
against cravings for foods as licentious as tomatoes and and
bread.
Andrea is happy with the treatment I've given her, and has referred
many of her friends to see me. Yet, I feel ill when I see her name
on my schedule. The first rule of medicine is "above all, do no
harm." Have I helped Andrea by freeing her from drugs, only to draw
her into the bondage of diet? My conscience isn't clear.
If it was cancer she had been cured of, or multiple sclerosis, I
suppose the development of an obsession wouldn't be too high a
price for physical health. However, all Andrea had was asthma. I
have asthma too. When she took her four medications, she had a
life. Now, all she has is a menu. Andrea might have been better off
had she never heard of dietary medicine.
I am generally lifted out of such melancholy reflections by some
substantial success. After Andrea, I saw Bob in follow-up, a man
whose rheumatoid arthritis was thrown into full remission by one
simple intervention: adding foods high in trace minerals to his
diet. Before he met me, he took prednisone, gold shots and high
doses of anti-inflammatories. Now he has gone a full year without a
problem. Seeing him encourages me not to give up entirely on making
dietary recommendations.
But my enthusiasm will remain tempered. Like all other medical
interventions -- like all other solutions to difficult problems --
dietary medicine dwells in a grey zone of unclarity and
imperfection. It's neither a simple, ideal treatment, as some of
its proponents believe, nor the complete waste of time conventional
medicine has too long presumed it to be. Diet is an ambiguous and
powerful tool, too unclear and emotionally charged for comfort, too
powerful to be ignored.